The Judge RANTS!
Digging The Plots
The deep-seated gullibility of my fellow feudal subjects never
ceases to provide material for my generally world-weary (and, at times,
sincerely insulting) attitude towards them.
This morning was a case in point. Screaming TV headlines,
sombre-looking hacks standing outside major public buldings, and the
return of that pointless figure, the 'terrorism expert' to the
So, another dastardly plot has been foiled, has it? Well, it must
have been, mustn't it? After all, we were being told so by every news
bulletin on television and radio. And they'd been told by the
Government, so it must be kosher, especially as MI5 and the
Metropolitan Police were also involved.
Consider that last point. The media had been told by:
- The MI5 of "there won't be an attack on public transport in
- The Metropolitan Police of "Honest, chief, he was a villain.
We tracked that terrorist all the way from his flat through busy
streets (where he could have blown up dozens of people, the slag!) and
then shot him dead in a crowded train carriage. He might have looked
like a Brazilian electrician to subversive raghead-loving elements, but
we know better".
- The Government of "Iraq's WMDs could hit London in 45
minutes, and why should Israel stop killing children in Lebanon?
They're only defending themselves".
In other words, the media have parrotted, without any sense either
of journalistic rigour or of the ridiculous, the assertions of three
organisations whose credibility and reputation have seldom, if ever,
And still people have fallen for it. In work today, all I seemed to
hear was, "They reckon that...‹foo›...", "They
reckon that...‹bar›...". All mere suggestions,
presented by the goggle-box as fact, and swallowed as same.
For we have been here before, dear reader. Some of you may remember
the 'Ricin Plot' of a couple of years or so ago. The Boys And Girls In
Blue (plus the Unmentionables, of course: those brave and stalwart
souls whose activities must forever be secret, but whose headquarters -
designed, it seems, by the love child of Albert Speer and Nicolae
Ceauşescu - nonetheless dominates the Thames riverfront) saved us from
a dastardly conspiracy to use poison to kill thousands of our fellow
...Except that there was no plot. Indeed, there was no
Ricin, either. The case ended in acquittals all round, much to the
embarrassment of the Government, who had to whip up some scare about
insanitary bicycle saddles or something in order to deflect attention
away from the fiasco.
And it's the same 'they' who 'reckon' this time, as
well. I caught a glimpse (more than enough when you're trying to eat
breakfast) of our beloved Home Secretary speaking live on television
this morning about the 'Pop-bottle Plot'. Was there, perhaps, just a
hint of long rehearsal to his performance? Perhaps a touch of the smug
as well? After all, he almost certainly knew of the raids in advance,
and would probably have known the day before, when he made yet another
intemperate attack upon judicial refusal to roll over and play dead in
the face of his agenda.
(At least his colleague, who might go down in history as The
Unknown Transport Minister, did look terrified, though whether
that was from fear of 'terrorists' or of the company he was having to
keep at 7.15 in the morning may only be guessed at).
"We have caught the key players", smirked Reid. Well, I like
the 'we': I know the Homuncule Secretary has donned the flak jacket
before, but he's to be congratulated on his part in the apprehension of
these ne'er-do-wells. What rôle he may have played in the operation
will no doubt remain forever secret, although I suspect he went along
to fang and hold the family Doberman while its master was being cuffed
by the bizzies.
"We have caught the key players", eh? I would have hoped
that, even in a country where fundamental rights are held to be
conditional on whether the Daily Mail likes the cut of your jib
or not, that would be a matter for the courts. Assuming it ever gets
to the courts, of course. How many 'major terrorist conspiracies' have
we seen 'smashed' in the last couple of years, only for the 'plotters'
to be released without charge only a week or two later or, at worst,
charged with some minor infringment of immigration laws? Enough, I
would suggest, to make one wary of such claims, especially from a
political desperado like Reid, trying to hold on to his job.
In any case, even if the matter should come to court, it
might reasonably be argued that, by opening his big Clydeside yap to
gloat at his success, Reid has irreparably damaged any chance the
defendants might have of a fair trial. A little bit of "They
reckon..." from a few office workers wouldn't do that, but a little
bit of "They did it!" from a senior politician, reported
extensively on TV and radio, should do the trick.
Unless, of course, there won't be a trial at all, and that the
dozen or so arrested this morning will be held at Belmarsh
indefinitely, in that English equivalent of Guantánamo, without
trial or charge. Or that any trial will be held largely in secret
(strictly because of the need not to compromise our security services,
you understand), where the brave corporate media will be reduced to
their proper function, namely parrotting the One True Way, as approved
by the relevant Department of State.
The media have failed us again, by failing to question, by failing
to examine, by treating the statements of senior politicians, top cops,
spook-handlers and 'terrorism experts' as if newly-chiselled on stone
from Mount Sinai.
The calculation has always been a simple one, even more so since
the advent of instant communications:
- The Government is in trouble, due to its slavish adherence to the
policies of a foreign power, its callous disregard for the slaughter of
innocents in Iraq, Palestine, Lebanon and elsewhere, its determination
to undermine basic freedoms at home, and its general air of malevolent
- Parliament is in recess, so the Government can't be called to
- Create a scare, preferably one which taps in to deep-seated
prejudices against a particular minority
- Make sure the media stay onside so as to maximise the potency of
We have been here before, too:
Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the
bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them
they are being attacked, and denounce the pacifists for lack of
patriotism, and exposing the country to greater danger."
"It also gives us a very special, secret pleasure to see how
unaware the people around us are of what is really happening to them."