Picture of a judge's wigThe Judge RANTS!Picture of a judge's wig

Date: 09/11/11

Sound Off...Please

I've mentioned before those anti-social twerps who allow their iPods, mp3 players, phones, what-'ave-yew to play in confined spaces and pollute the air all around them.

Today, I encountered a new twist to the offence.

Got on the bus to work this morning and, making my way to my seat, heard the unmistakable sound of one of these hellish devices. Not the "tsk, tsk, tsk" of someone who doesn't realise that their earpieces are leaking like an incontinent dachshund, but the full sound.

Looking around for the culprit, the only other passenger on the bus was an elderly gentleman who clearly was not the source of the outrage.

I then realised that the racket was coming from the cab.

Yes, on a bus festooned with notices with headlines like "Switch it off!" and "Keep it down!", the bloody driver had whatever it was on. And it was clearly audible right down the bus, too.

I sat there and seethed all the way down. Other people got on, but were either not bothered by it or didn't want to commit that tewwible Bwitish sin, 'making a fuss'.

Not wanting to get thrown off and be late for work, I waited until I reached my stop. As I got to the door, I turned to the oaf (late-40s, bald, glasses) and said, "Do you know you're not supposed to have that on?"

"I can have it on if I like", he grunted.

"It's the same rule for you as for passengers.", I said. "If we shouldn't, then neither should you."

"I'm not allowed to wear headphones when I'm driving", said the yob, as if by way of explanation.

"Why do you need it on at all?", I enquired.

"Entertainment", he said, as if that clinched it.

"Sorry", I said, "but if it happens again, I'll have to report you."

"Report me if you like", sneered the tool as I got off.

I was wondering whether he would be driving the bus I was to catch home this afternoon, and had visions of the bastard deliberately driving past me. In which event, I also had visions of me walking a short distance up the hill to the bus depot and making a formal complaint.

You might think that I'm making too much of this, but his behaviour was just so bloody rude. I mean, it's bad enough when it's one of those "I can do what I like and fuck you" teenage girls that seem to infest our area nowadays, but when it's the bus driver himself, I have to say something.

I await his revenge, and will be careful to stay clear of kerb-side puddles for the foreseeable.